"Thank you," "you're doing a good job," and other priceless awards

I was chatting to someone at an event recently, and the topic of longevity in the SCA came up. Since very shortly after I joined, I've been told that the average SCAdian lasts around 3-5 years before quitting. I've heard a few reasons for this - internal politics, failure to integrate into one group or another, event burnout, etc. - but this person had a slightly different perspective.

In your first 1-5 years in the Society, it's common to receive quite a lot of recognition fairly quickly for the things that you do. If you're active, you'll probably get an Award of Arms, maybe a baronial award for service, combat, and/or arts and sciences, and possibly even a kingdom-level award for the same. After that, there's quite a long gap. Everyone knows that you make beautiful clothes or run the best events around, and since you've been recognized for it, there's not much more to say - at least, unless you receive a peerage ten or fifteen years down the road for it. You start to feel forgotten or underappreciated after a while, which makes other small annoyances seem larger.

Now, I'm not sure that I totally agree with this person's perspective. (I'm not sure everyone is that bothered about how often they receive awards.) However, if people leaving the SCA is at least partially caused by feeling underappreciated by the community, it may be possible to fix it. It's good practice in general to express appreciation for the people around you.

At a recent meeting of the Montengarde Culinary Group, someone went out of their way to tell me that they thought I'd been doing a good job. I respect this person hugely, and that small comment was worth much more to me than any formal award I've received to this point. The simple courtesy of just saying "thank you," "you did a wonderful job," or even "I love how you do 'x'" in a meaningful, sincere way can be even more important than an award recommendation to someone whose energy is flagging.

Here are some of the ways I intend to show more gratitude and appreciation for others in the SCA in the future:

1. After eating my meal, I will make a point of thanking at least one member of the feast team for taking dozens of hours out of their busy schedule to cook for the populace.
2. When I check in at gate, I will thank whoever is sitting in the cold, wet, or blazing heat (the three seasons of Avacal) for taking the time out to check people in.
3. When I notice people moving tables, thrones, erics, or other heavy items, especially on a regular basis, I will thank them for the hard physical work that they do so that we can all enjoy the event. We don't get to see their bruises, sore muscles, and stubbed toes the next day - but we can all appreciate the ability to sit and watch court or take shelter under the pavilions they put up!
4. I will clean up after myself, and if possible, stay late to help the tear-down team. It's an incredibly difficult job, especially after a long day, and even one more set of hands makes it go so much faster. If I am unable to stay to clean up, I will thank the people tearing down for sacrificing their time to do it for the rest of us.
5. I will make a note to thank royalty and landed barons/baronesses for their incredibly important service at some point during their reign. Even though I have only a very little experience on retinue for Her Majesty Queen Inga, I have had a small glimpse into how very difficult it is to do these duties and how much of a sacrifice it is to serve the entire kingdom as a royal or landed peer.
6. I will thank officers as they step up and step down for their service. Their administrative work in the background makes it possible for us to organize ourselves and play this game. I promise to never say "poor you" or "what a sucker" when someone takes an office. I will not speak sarcastically about officer positions, complain about the fact that nobody has taken an office, or complain about an officer in a non-constructive fashion, and I will do my best to take on an office when time and energy allow.
7. I will thank people who regularly host activities in their own home, and those who organize activities, championships, prize competitions, and tournaments with their own time and energy. Without them, we wouldn't have fight practice, A&S practice, Polyphonia, archery practice, dance practice, Culinary Group, tavern, and many more things besides!
8. I will thank the event stewards every time I attend an event for all of the sleepless nights, hours planning, and stress around putting an event together. If I need to communicate with an event steward during the event planning process, I will speak to them with the kindness, gratefulness and respect that I would if someone was doing me a personal favor. They are doing everyone in the kingdom a personal favor by taking on the responsibility of hosting the event.
9. I will speak about the research, arts, martial activities, or service which other people enjoy with the greatest respect and enthusiasm. I will not fool myself into thinking that the activities and tasks I like to do in the SCA are more important, essential, or interesting than anyone else's. I will not suggest that what I enjoy should take more precedence than what someone else enjoys.
10. If I like what someone is doing, I will say so. If I appreciate what someone has done, I will say so. If someone has inspired me through their actions or words, I will tell them.

How do you show your appreciation for the people in your shire, barony, or kingdom? 

Trying New Things

When we join the SCA, I think it's fair to say that most people find what they like to do and who they like to do it with relatively quickly. However, I believe that it's important to allow yourself the opportunity to experience a wide range of activities and responsibilities in the SCA - you may not enjoy all of them, but it will definitely give you an appreciation for the hard work that other people do in disciplines and service areas that you don't regularly undertake!

Here's a little quiz I saw making the rounds on Facebook not too long ago - how many of these things have you done? If you haven't done many, why not set yourself a goal of trying some new things next year?

SCA BUCKET LIST

General

Been an officer? 
Yes! I was Montengarde's Family Activities Coordinator from 2014-2016.

Do you have an SCA name? 
Yes, Alice Percy.

Do you have an SCA persona? 
Sort of. I have a sort of storyline where there are several Alice Percys in the same family spanning many generations, which vaguely justifies my time travelling garb. I am interested in too many periods in history to pin myself down very well! They are all from the same region (West Sussex) and run from the 3rd century to the very end of the 16th century.

Changed persona because of different garb?
Not as such, I just sort of adapt my persona to fit what I'm wearing.

Been adopted by a person, household or clan? 
Yes, I'm a member of house Fines Lames.

Had a name and/or device accepted by the SCA College of Arms? 
Yes, both!

Had a name and/or device rejected by the SCA College of Arms? 
I had the name Alice Percy sent back because someone was very similar to me, so technically I am "Alice Percy of Montengarde."

Been taken as or taken an apprentice, protege or squire?
Yes, I am honored to be the protegee of Mistress Coryn of the Wode, OP.

Events

Been an Event Steward/Autocrat? 
Yes! I co-stewarded Twelfth Night 2016 with Sorcha de Lenche and Audrey Hampton, and I was Bronwyn the Ever-present's co-steward at Beltane 2015.

Cooked at an Event? 
Yep! I'm starting to get a little more experienced at helping in the kitchen, but I still feel really nervous every single time. When the Culinary Group was really new, we put on a small ticketed feast at a tavern we called the Feast of St. Cecilia in November 2014, and then we made appetizers for Beltane 2015. I've since cooked at a couple of Quad Wars, coordinated the Montengarde contribution for Spring TUA's feast in 2016, and helped Coryn with feeding folks at Silverwolf and Sergeantry Trials in 2016. I'm co-stewarding the feast at Samhain this year with the rest of the Culinary Group, too.

Taught a class at an event? 
Yep, I taught a "Quad Talk" on period cooking basics at Quad War 2015 and I taught a class on period cosmetics at Yule 2015.

Run an activity at an event? 
Sort of, I've run a couple of super soaker fights and other children's activities at events, but nothing for grown-ups!

Ever fought at an event? 
Nope!

Ever fought at Pennsic or another War? 
Nope!

Done a different martial art at an event? 
Nope!

Ever run a martial activity at an event? 
Nope!

Fought at an event tourney? Shot at an event tourney? 
Nope!

Ever fought in a Crown Tourney? 
Nope! I did have the honor of inspiring Muireann at Avacal's first Crown, though.

Won a tourney or contest at an event? 
Nope!

Made your own armor? 
Nope!

Made your own weapons?
Do badly-burnt wafers count?

Been a squire?
Nope!

Have rank as an archer?
Nope!

Have rank as a fencer? 
Nope!

Created a siege weapon? 
Nope!

Arts & Sciences

Have you ever entered an A&S contest? 
I entered my version of the hair powder and rose water mixture from the Trotula at Samhain 2013 just for comment, which was about a month after I joined the SCA. I've been meaning to enter a competition properly since then, but I always freak myself out before I get an entry together! If you count bardic, though, I did enter and win the Montengarde Bardic championship in 2014.

Have you ever won an A&S contest? 
Nope, unless you count bardic - see above.

Ever run an A&S contest? 
Nope, unless you count bardic, in which case I ran the championship to choose my successor in 2015.

Ever judge/critique items in an A&S contest? 
Yes, I've judged a few different A&S competitions, including Kingdom A&S in 2016.

Ever wordsmith a scroll? 
Nope!

Illuminated a scroll? 
No, but it looks really fun!

Done the Calligraphy for a scroll? 
No, I write like a ten-year-old boy.

Made your own paper?
Nope!

Made a book? 
Nope!

Make someone's order medallion?
Nope!

Write someone in for an award?
Yes, I try to make it a point to reflect on what I've seen and recommend people at least twice a year.

Have you ever sewn your own garb? 
Yes, badly!

Sewn Garb for others? 
No, my household is wise enough to keep me away from their garb.

Ever been sewing on the way to an event? 
Nope!

Ever finished an outfit before an event? 
No, because I'm in house Fines Lames, which means we're basically not allowed to wear fully finished clothes.

Researched and completed an outfit from said research? 
Yes, I really love researching, but my execution is extremely poor.

Ever taught a class on sewing? 
Nope!

Finished a hat? 
Yes, I made a simple coif once. Unfortunately it doesn't fit.

Do you know how to spin? 
No, but I really admire people who do spin.

Ever woven your own fabric? 
Nope, but I think it's a beautiful art.

Do you know how to knit? 
Nope!

Do you know how to crochet? 
Nope!

Have you ever dyed your own yarn or fabric?
Nope!

Embroidered a garment? 
I helped a little bit on some pockets.

Beaded a garment? 
Nope!

Ever entertained at a feast? 
Yes, also badly!

Ever ran a bardic circle?
Absolutely! I ran a few as part of my tenure as bardic champion.

Ever performed in a bardic circle? 
Yes! I really like bardic circles and I enjoy performing, but not solo. I still get terrible stage fright, which is an unfortunate quality in a bardic champion!

Had songs requested from you at such? 
Nope!

Ever competed in a formal bardic? 
Yes, see above.

Know any period songs? 
You bet! Many more since I've been hanging around with the Polyphonia folks.

BONUS: Have you ever translated a scroll? No, but wouldn't it be neat to be able to do that?

Court

Ran a court as Royalty? 
Nope!

Ran a court as Herald? 
Nope!

Heralded at Court? 
Nope!

Been an Attendant, Guard or Champion at court? 
Yes, as bardic champion.

Been called to court to receive an award? 
Yes! A Golden Link, two Rose Petals, and an AoA.

Been called to court to present something? 
Yes! Also one of the most embarrassing SCA moments in my life to date. It was the end of the night at the Twelfth Night I was running and feast and court had both gone extremely long, so I was exhausted. I was supposed to be announcing the winner of the Silk Road fashion show which was part of the event, but I missed being called and someone had to tell me I'd been called up. I kneeled in front of the baron and baroness, and we stared at each other for a full fifteen seconds before Baroness Una kindly informed me why I was up there...oh well.

Been called to court for punishment? 
No, but I was called up as part of the "Wheel of Court" at Samhain 2014, which was basically the greastest court schtick of all time.

Been part of a court "schtick"? 
Yes, see above!

Done something while watching court, e.g., spin, sew, embroider? 
No, that would be much too productive! Also I usually like to listen to what's going on, I quite like court most of the time.

Had a royal comment on what you're doing?
Sir Gunther (Prince Gunther at the time) once told me I had a nice smile, and I think that's very high praise indeed!

Have awards from more than one Kingdom?
Nope, though it would be neat to live somewhere else one day and see what it was like!

Travel

Ever traveled more than 8 hours each way for a one day event? 
No! I'm not that hardcore!

Gone to a different Kingdom for an event? 
Not yet!

Lived in a different Kingdom? 
Nope!

Have trailer hitch and trailer, mainly because of the SCA? 
No, my husband doesn't play so I have to keep things reasonable.

What ridiculous lengths you've gone to get to an event? 
I definitely haven't gone to ridiculous lengths to get to an event compared to a lot of people! The furthest I've ever been for an event was Sigelhundas, but I flew so I feel like it doesn't properly count somehow!

The Mundane

Run out of closet space because of garb/gear? 
I try to move things along if I find that I don't use them enough, but I did just get rid of a whole bunch of mundane clothes partially so I could have more SCA space!

Ever crammed more than 4 people into a hotel room? No, the most ever was 3 so far I think when Peter, Bronwyn and I got stuck in a snowstorm heading back from Snoweaters one year.

Met your future spouse at an SCA event? 
Nope! My husband doesn't play, although he is very supportive as long as I'm having fun and not spending our rent money.

Met most past significant others in an SCA setting?
Nope!

Have better research books than your public library?
That's the dream!

Is your tent bigger than your first apartment? 
No, I don't actually own a tent! My household and my Pelican are very kind and so I have never gone without somewhere to sleep.

How many sewing machines do you have? 
Just one!

Own an anvil? 
Nope!

Own a lucet? 
No, although it looks like a fun craft to do.

Own a period mug? 
Nope! Mine is a somewhat embarrassing German Oktoberfest looking ceramic thing that I got at Value Village for a dollar - I have to collect things slowly, I'll get there!